Unity in the church at the cost of FALSE TEACHING too?
"The church I attend is in denial that anything is a 'problem', including the high number of singles in the church. We're all apparently meant to sit back and have God 'magically' do something and to challenge that approach draws criticism for not trusting in the 'Wonderful Plan' and not being sufficiently patient. At 39, frankly, I'm through with being patient. Even if the church was burning down you'd be hard-pressed to have them admit there was a problem.
The 'Gift of Singleness' teaching is completely spurious, and we are currently experiencing the consequences of this in that if you're aren't yet married we just meant to quietly accept 'it is God's will'.I find it helpful to think of this situation like finding a job. If we sit in our rooms and don't send out CVs it is highly unlikely anyone will call us out of the blue and unsolicited with our 'dream job'. Yes, God can do this - but by and large - we all know He doesn't.
I don't know whether or not God does have partners for us but I do think that in finding jobs, finding new homes that God meets our need in our proactivity. We knock on doors and He opens the right ones - but we've got to be out there knocking on doors. "
The 'Gift of Singleness' teaching is completely spurious, and we are currently experiencing the consequences of this in that if you're aren't yet married we just meant to quietly accept 'it is God's will'.I find it helpful to think of this situation like finding a job. If we sit in our rooms and don't send out CVs it is highly unlikely anyone will call us out of the blue and unsolicited with our 'dream job'. Yes, God can do this - but by and large - we all know He doesn't.
I don't know whether or not God does have partners for us but I do think that in finding jobs, finding new homes that God meets our need in our proactivity. We knock on doors and He opens the right ones - but we've got to be out there knocking on doors. "
posted by Captain Sensible at 4:43 PM
3 Comments:
Well I do happen to think that finding a job vs. a spouse (I'm trying to decide which one is more difficult for me lately) is a very good comparison.
My friend I have, who is married, yet agonized over being single beforehand, now offers her platitudes related the "gift" of singleness and how it just might be God's will for me not to be married or be a mother, etc., if we see ourselves not finding a spouse, etc.
Yet she is nothing short of persistent in her insistence to me that I apply for jobs, look for jobs, do everything I can to find a job etc. In other words, be proactive about it.
Gee, why is it ok to be proactive about finding a job but not a spouse?
Shazia, you need to ask your friend straight out why God gave HER a spouse but is denying YOU one!
Captain, you need to tell all your readers to check out the article on the spuriousness of the "gift of singleness" that is currently posted on www.crosswalk.com. Interestingly, Crosswalk also publishes, on a semi-regular basis, the writings of pro-gift-of-singleness Carolyn McCulley! I'm reminded of your post on the seeming split personality of Boundless when it comes to this issue. Looks like Crosswalk has the same problem.
Anonymous - Thanks! Fab article, and for once it's not by Debbie Maken! There is another sane Christian in the world writing about singleness - that makes two now!
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