Happy Independence Day!

Frieda Fruitcake writes: As it is now Independence Day in the UK, I would just like to...er, no, that's not right. I mean, as it turns into the 4th of July here in the UK, I would just like to wish all my singleness-gifted sisters and last few remaining brothers in the church across the pond a very blessed Independence Day!
How this day never fails to remind me of the parable of the Prodigal Son!
Rest assured, you only have to ask for forgiveness, and you shall receive. Your rebellious spirit has already been dealt with at the cross!
Praise the Lord!
My prayer for you today is for you to humble yourselves and stop all this silly nonsense about "independence"!
A nice, fat, juicy piece of Mad Cow is ready and waiting for y'all!
(Well, it obviously never did me any harm!)