Then the Lord said to Moses: "Why are you crying out to me?"

Captain Sensible writes: I am appreciative of some Bible devotional notes by Selwyn Hughes for the following observation:
"Did you know that once God rebuked Moses for praying? 'Then the Lord said to Moses, "Why are you crying out to me? Tell the Israelites to move on."' (Exodus 14:15-16) Moses had already prayed -- now came the time for action."
But turning to this passage, we see more than that. In the previous verse, Moses was basically telling the Israelites to wait and trust in the Lord. "The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still."
Does this sound familiar to anyone? Like in a "Wait on the Lord" and "Trust God to bring you your spouse" kind of way?
Of course, it is important to be persistent in prayer, we know that. But at the same time, once we know what to do, we need to play our part. How lazy is it to simply cry out to God and do nothing except pray? This is not Biblical. This is not showing great faith. Along with prayer must come action.
So, let's see if we can devise a plan of action, shall we?
a) We need to address the situation with regard to the lack of men in the church as a matter of urgency. Church leaders must NOT be allowed to continually take the course of least resistance with their "Family Fun Days" and "Children's Ministry", when the Body of Christ is in crisis due to the lack of testosterone within it! And whilst these things, and popular overseas mission trips too, are good, we need to consider that we are now in the position of having missionaries come to us here in the UK! We have a crisis on our hands here, people! Maybe it is God's plan for us to get our own house in order before gallivanting off to exotic lands? And it doesn't do to get too complacent about our children's ministries either. If we carry on at the rate we are going, with fewer and fewer men in the church, then soon there will very few children in our churches in order to minister to! And this is backed up by statistical evidence of growing numbers of singles.
b) We need to encourage the men we do have to be proactive about finding a wife and also help them in outreaching to their peers. The two go hand-in-hand, in my experience. Let's have less of the cosy, non-committal brotherly/sisterly fellowshipping and hours spent alone at the computer, and more of the reaching out to the lost on our doorstep. But that will only happen when the men are happily settled at home with a wife! After all, what must the men in the world make of their fully-grown, celibate, work colleagues? Isn't there a danger that rather than seeing them as salt and light and having a lifestyle to emulate, with their loving wife and well-behaved children, they rather look on them as a bit weird to say the least, or even possibly "most likely gay, but being a hypocrital Christian, obviously in denial about it"?
c) Single Christian women need to be proactive too. Not in terms of pursuing men, but more in making themselves available to be pursued and not over-spiritualising the whole process.
d) We may need to re-examine what exactly is meant by the instruction to not be yoked with unbelievers. We tend to assume this to mean not marrying non church-goers, and therefore Christian women shouldn't even date them, but are the two things both necessarily synonymous? Is dating the same as "yoking", and is a non-believer the same thing as a non church-goer? Maybe there are believing men in the world, that need encouragement in their faith, are alienated by "church" and are desperately ripe for the harvest? That seems to be the indication from the few ministries that do reach out to men. Is it such a dangerous thing to date a believer from outside of church circles? Maybe that's a way of bringing believing men inside church circles? This will not only shake-up the men in the church that are overly passive about finding a wife, but it just might bring in the required testosterone that the entire Body, not just the single women, is crying out for? In fact, would the "gift of singleness" nonsense ever have even took off, if there were enough men to go around?
Food for thought?

Should Christian Leaders Now "Advocate" Singleness to their Congregations?

Captain Sensible writes: “Single women – A challenge to the church?” by Kristin Aune is the most frightening book I have ever read.
Never have I come across a Christian book on singleness that has sent chills down my spine as much as this one has (and bear in mind I have read Carolyn McCulley, with her chapter on “Esteeming the gift”, which seems like a Disney picture book in comparison).
The first chill came as soon as I opened it and read the following quotation:

“Single woman is not just some cultural oddity. She is our future.”
(Jay Rayner, “We want to be alone”, The Observer, 6th January 2000)

The second major chill came on reading the stark statistics from the 1998 English Church Attendance survey, although they came as no surprise. This survey stated that of the almost half a million single evangelical Christian in the UK, some 334,000 of them (0.7% of the population) are single evangelical women. Yet there are only 153,000 single evangelical men (0.3% of the population).
But the greatest chill of all came in the author’s “recommendations” towards the end of the book:

“Christians should not try to matchmake and should not endorse dating agencies (Christian or otherwise). Instead of encouraging dating couples to marry, the benefits of remaining single should be pointed out...It is more justifiable biblically to advise against marriage than to promote it, and the church needs to begin to practise this...Christian leaders must begin to advocate singleness to their congregations. While there is a temptation to sympathize with those who want to marry but cannot find a partner, to do so is not biblical. Single people need to be taught what the Bible says about the advantages of singleness. Single Christians should be challenged not to reluctantly accept the gift of singleness but to embrace it. Since single people make up such a large proportion of the church, singleness needs to be taught about as frequently and in as much detail as is marriage...Positive teaching about singleness can never begin too early, and children and young people also need to be taught its value...Young women may enter adulthood with a biblical perspective on the need to save sex for marriage, but they rarely consider the prospect that they may not marry, because they have not been taught a biblical view of the gift of singleness. It is not until they are in their twenties that the realization dawns that there are far fewer single Christian men than women and that their expectations of marriage may never be fulfilled. By this time, it can be difficult for them to get rid of the mindset which views marriage as a probable, if not definite, part of their future.”

Does anyone else feel the need to pray that these recommendations will be bound up in the name of Jesus -- or is it just me?
I have been wondering when to share on this blog a dream that was recounted to me by a woman that I trust, and I think now is that time.
Here is the dream:

“In our passion to cultivate our own land to satisfy the need in our soul, we focus on a very small patch of land and we are not heeding the call to work this expanse of land that we need to be cultivating. The harvest from the small patch of land will not satisfy our need; we need to expand our horizon.”

Through a particular ministry involvement, it has become very clear to me that there is a harvest of men that I believe God has prepared in the world. The problem has been that there are not enough ministries which reach out to them.
Here in the UK, and I believe to a lesser degree in other western nations, we face a very stark choice.
Do we agree with Aune that "It is more justifiable biblically to advise against marriage than to promote it" and that “Christian leaders must begin to advocate singleness to their congregations” and “Single Christians should be challenged not to reluctantly accept the gift of singleness but to embrace it”?
Or do we believe God to be a God of order, not chaos, and as such it could never have been His plan that the Body of Christ should be so lacking in masculinity, to the degree that not only is His creation mandate thwarted, but the Body has become so dysfunctional that it is ineffective in our culture?
Can we even imagine any other religion being so stupid as to "advocate singleness" instead of increasing their ranks?
I pray that we make the right choice and act upon it as a matter of urgency.

The Correct Response to the Dreaded Singleness Contentment Lecture!

Captain Sensible writes: The Singleness Contentment Lecture is no doubt all too familiar to those suffering from protracted singleness -- particularly barren women, who tend to feel their singleness and accompanying childlessness the most painfully. Once again, Debbie Maken's wisdom on this subject is unsurpassed. Here is her answer to a question raised on her blog referring to Paul's mention of having learned the secret of being content in every circumstance. (Philippians 4:10-13)
I recommend learning Debbie's answer off by rote and practising it daily in front of the mirror, until you can recite it seamlessly and with the appropriate expression of gentle, but firm, instruction on your face. Think along the lines of a school teacher who must correct the errors of a small child.
Is that a bit unkind?
No, unfortunately it is necessary in order that the lecture-bearer does not continue to make already hurting people feel a whole lot worse.
That's true kindness.

"When Paul is talking about contentment, he is saying that he has an object for his contentment, that is, the Lord. He finds his contentment in the Lord, not in his circumstances, whether he is rich or poor, well fed or hungry. It is entirely possible to be content in the Lord yet find your circumstances are less than desirable. Just like a person who is wrongly imprisoned need not marvel at bread and water in jail, I do not think that those who are single need extol its greatness or pretend that it is inconsequential just to prove that they are somehow 'content.' Even in I Cor. 7, Paul advised those who were slaves to gain their freedom; it has nothing to do with whether the slaves were content with their masters, it was an acknowledgement that man was never designed to be a slave and should be working toward his freedom. The same analogy works for those who are single; they should be working to achieve marriage, instead of pretending that the status quo is marvelous."

Commanded in the Name of Jesus to stop wondering if you have the "gift of singleness!"

Captain Sensible writes: I love this plain talking here! A man after my own heart, indeed. What a refreshing change from the insanity of the "church lady" types that scold anyone who dares to question the existence of the "gift of singleness", and encourage single Christian women to "wait" and "trust"...and when all that seems a bit frustrating and contrary to God's desire for us to be fellow-workers with Him, they are then told they can "prepare" for marriage. Except of course no one can really prepare, so they're back to "waiting" and "trusting"...
What a muddle!
Here's some plain talking from the rather fabulous, Gillis Triplett. I am not sure I agree that there is no (extremely rare) gifting towards celibacy, but hey, that's a minor consideration. Be energised as you read!

Do You Have The Gift of Marriage Or The Gift of Singleness?
"This popular teaching has been circulating in many Christian circles for years. However, it does not originate from the Written Word of God. There is no such thing in the Bible as the gift of singleness or the gift of marriage! If you have been wondering which gift you do have, I command you in the Name of Jesus, to stop it right now! You have neither because in the economy of God they do not exist. I realize the people espousing such doctrines are sincere; nevertheless, this teaching does not emanate from the Scriptures. It stems from the opinions, pride, fears and subverted beliefs of men. That is why you are bound under God to fully reject it."

Let God Be Your Husband or Your Wife?
"I have heard many single Christians be told by well meaning ministers to allow God to be their husband or wife. To be quite frank, I don't know where this ludicrous doctrine started. All I can tell you is that it did not originate from the Written Word of God. Jesus said in John 4:24, 'God is a spirit.'
I cannot kiss a spirit. I cannot make love to a spirit. I cannot hold a spirit's hand. I cannot run my hands through a spirit's hair. Are you following me?
A spirit cannot rub my back, eat breakfast with me, hold me or give birth to my children. Only a live flesh and blood wife can do those things.
God can no more be your husband or your wife, anymore than He can be your postman or your auto mechanic! When you hear people make such ridiculous statements, mark them as spiritually unlearned, and go on about your business."

Marriage Is Not A Gift - Marriage Is God's Divine Order
Here are some critical things God said about marriage:

Genesis 1:28, “… God said unto them, Be fruitful and multiply and replenish the earth…”

Genesis 2:18, “It is not good that the man should be alone…”

Genesis 2:24, “Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.”

Proverbs 18:22, “Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing…”

Jeremiah 29:6 NIV, “Marry and have sons and daughters; find wives for your sons and give your daughters in marriage, so that they too may have sons and daughters. Increase in number there; do not decrease.

I Timothy 5:14, “I will therefore that the younger woman marry, bear children, guide the house…”

Proverbs 5:18, “Let thy fountain be blessed: and rejoice with the wife of thy youth.

Ecclesiastes 9:9, “Live joyfully with the wife of thy youth…”

"Engrave this crucial point in your mind. Marriage is not a gift. Marriage is God's divine order for mankind!"


Amen! Now read the rest of this article and allow it to inspire you to stand up to those in error here

Debbie Maken in London!

Don't forget, there are two opportunities to see Debbie Maken this weekend:

Friday 26th January, 7.30pm, Watford, Herts
Details on: www.LastFriday.com


11.00am, Saturday 27th January, Camden, London
Details on:www.LondonChristians.co.uk

Breaking the yoke of the "gift of singleness"

Captain Sensible writes: Another encouraging email I have received. Interesting the wider implications of all this. Implications which I believe will have a far-reaching effect on the entire Body of Christ and the harvest on our doorstep...

You know the Bible says the yoke shall be destroyed because of the anointing, the anointing is the presence of God, the Spirit of God. I pray that this anointing will break the yoke of the "gift of singleness" in the lives of men and women in this country, whether they believe it because the church says so, or they believe it because they have tried so hard for their desires to be fulfilled and they find no way out, and it’s just easier to believe this "gift" than keep trying and pushing in.
But do you know I believe that anointing will break much more than that.

Singleness is NOT a Gift! We're Going to Shout it From the Rooftops!

Captain Sensible writes: My good friends at London Christians have sent me a copy of an email that they have received today. Apparently, every time they feel despondent at the strength of the enemy's stronghold in this area -- and they assure me that it really is EVERY time -- an email arrives within about five minutes, which hugely encourages them and makes them feel like shouting from the rooftops...
We are not going to "wait on the Lord" any longer, as we strongly believe that the Lord is waiting on us to act. And isn't that just a little bit rude? To make the Lord "wait" for the goldly marriages and children that He desires, because WE in our generation, have got it so wrong?
I thought I would post it here to share the encouragement to everyone that is working so hard in this battle!


To the group at London Christians.

I will not be able to attend the talk on the gift of singleness next Saturday but I thank God that it is going ahead. I am sick to death of people telling me to wait on the Lord for a spouse. I am not stupid enough to think that my biological clock will wait on him. Not many women give birth naturally (for the first time) in their forties, and men postpone marriage knowing that they can have children at an advanced age, with a much younger women….or so they hope.

I am so glad that someone has woken up to this, let this be the start of a new wave of thinking about singleness…move over Al Hsu!

The Importance of Waiting on the Lord

"I don't ever recall hearing from someone to wait upon the Lord and let Him find a college for me."
(Comment posted by male on another blog)

Frieda Fruitcake writes: What heathen wrote this! Of course you must let the Lord find you a college! How else would you know if you were at "God's best" place of learning?
Now, I say this not to boast, but that is exactly what Frieda Fruitcake did!
However, no college approached me after I failed all my exams.
(I also trusted in the Lord to supply me with the necessary knowledge at exam time too. Not for me the false idol of study, masquerading as an angel of light!)
It simply wasn't the Lord's will for me to get an education, that's all.
We must be content in all circumstances; in wisdom and in stupidity.
Praise the Lord for allowing me such undivided attention on Him, and protecting me from the treacherous false idols of books and learning!

Romantic Love is...Unmentionable!

Captain Sensible writes: When was the last time, I wonder, that you heard a talk in church about the Song of Songs (ie. "the best of all songs")? Or heard your Pastor encourage the singles in the congregation to follow God's frequent commands to get married and have a family?
Hmmm? Hmmmm?
Thought not.
Having conducted my own highly non-scientific study, it appears to be unanimously round about, er, never.
I have heard Pastors stand up in front of their congregation and defiantly state that they will talk about this controversial subject, or fearlessly exclaim that non-politically correct belief. They are not afraid of the Gospel, they declare!
But will they dare to say that there is a book in the Bible full of the joys and delights of erotic love? Or even ask us to turn in our Bibles to the passages where God tells us we need to get married?
Seems not.
Romantic love is, apparently, unmentionable.
(Aside from an occasional reminder to guard our hearts of course if we sinfully talk about love -- which kind of puts a negative spin on it in any case, so that's probably acceptable.)
So it was admittedly quite a revelation to me to read this article.
I am sure this is only one interpretation of much of the Song of Songs' content. But even the Captain's eyes were opened at the sheer, unadulterated pleasure of erotic love that is described in its pages!
I like the author's explanation of the use of symbolism: "When God spoke of personal aspects of sex in the Song of Songs, He could have used the slang terms; however, they would tend to raise up our psychological censors. He could have used the medical terms, but that would leave a feeling of 'mechanics' and science and often a sense of awkwardness. The Lord avoided both problems by using poetic symbolism."
God seems to rather approve of love and sex. So why do we disapprove, and try to play it down all of the time? As if virtually any of us could live fully without it!
Oh, and about that guarding your heart business (which as we all know is next to impossible to do anyway). The author of this article suggests another interpretation of "Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires": "The experience of lovemaking is too powerful to be aroused before the couple have committed themselves in marriage."
I think I prefer that interpretation.
And when you have finished reading about erotic love, and ONLY then, will you be in the mood to hear some romantic music, do you think? It's not "the best of all songs"; we know that is in the Bible. But it is nice. Secular songwriters do seem to understand this whole love business a lot better than the Christian leaders who tell us that the "gift of marriage" is equal to the fictitious "gift of singleness". (Apologies people; I think I am just a little bit in love with YouTube at the moment...)
Paul Weller: English Rose

Beware! The 14th February approaches!

Captain Sensible writes: Yes, folks, we are nearing Valentine's Day. This can only mean one thing. An intensity in contentment lectures if you dare to express any disappointment at not having someone to love!
Ladies and gentlemen, this is no longer acceptable behaviour.
There is nothing wrong with being unhappy about not having someone to love. That's normal, that's the way God made us to feel, that's the way it should be. You're right. They're wrong. It's not making an idol out of love, nor is it leaving God out of the equation.
What is not acceptable however, is feeling unhappy and doing nothing about it. Or, over-spiritualising to the extent that being lazy somehow becomes "God's will" or "waiting on His timing".
Uh-uh. It's laziness and it probably has its roots in wrong theology.
For those in London, there is of course the opportunity to hear something that is actually helpful for a change and meet someone to love, at the Debbie Maken talk on January 27th.
But regardless of whether you meet someone in the next few weeks or not, it's okay to feel lonely -- yes, despite having lots of friends and the "church family" -- because you want someone special to love.
However it's not okay to be lazy, it's not okay to be commitment phobic (guys, that means you!), and it is most certainly not okay to meekly accept an unbiblical contentment lecture!
Once again, instead of turning to a church leader, I am obliged to turn to the wisdom of pop stars, and, once again it is the songwriter from The Feeling, this time a track called Never Be Lonely. I particularly appreciate the line: "They tell me to fight it. But they can b****y well just try it!"
Perhaps that is the answer when the next married father or mother, with three kids, who met their spouse in youth group, and were married by 21, tells you that you need to "be content"?
Oh, alright then, you can show grace if you insist! You're obviously a better man than the Captain!
PS: Calling all Londoners! We're not that rude on our commute to work...are we?
The Feeling: Never Be Lonely
(There is a slight delay in the music at the start of this video. You just need to, ahem, wait on the Lord for a minute there...)

Important Announcement!

Captain Sensible writes: Some things are just worth shamelessly plugging...

A London Christians (pre-Valentine’s Day!) Special Event:

Is singleness really a “gift”?

Believe in a “gift of singleness” (after all, that’s what you’ve been told is in the Bible) yet feel sure you haven’t got it? At least, you hope not…

Not exactly enamoured at the thought of another year passing, and still no sign of a spouse on the horizon?

Guys, are you wondering whether it is wrong, or -- let's face it -- maybe just slightly uncool, to be proactive about marriage?

Women, are you struggling to “be content” and “wait on the Lord” whilst all the time wondering if your biological clock will wait too?

Read more about this special daytime event, to be held in central London on Saturday 27th January, in a stunning venue which is furnished with red chandeliers, billowing drapes and even beds (yes, beds!) for lounging on, at the London Christians website now!

The Sorry Tale of the Right Reverend Longbottom, Debbie Maken and a Den of Iniquity!

Frieda Fruitcake writes: Brace yourselves, dear readers.
It is with deep sadness that I have to bring you news of the recent demise of my Church of England Vicar, the Right Reverend Archibald Longbottom.
Readers may remember that we left Reverend Longbottom lying in a hospital bed diagnosed with "nervous exhaustion" just prior to Christmas. Apparently, the strain of church leadership proved too much for his delicate constitution and I regret to inform you that he has now "fallen asleep". Now a new Vicar needs to be sought for our noble English village parish of Pratt's End.
Moving from bad to worse, it also pains me to report that we are expecting the imminent arrival on these shores of a certain Debbie Maken. (I sincerely hope I am wrong, but I am sure I detected a note of glee in the Captain's recent post on this most distressing of developments!)
In the interests of research I investigated the website of London Christians , the culprits of this wrongdoing. You can imagine my horror when I saw that this talk on the precious gift of singleness is promoted with the following:

Is singleness really a "gift"? We've been told it is, but is it true? What does the Bible actually say about singleness, and is it right to call it a spiritual "gift"? Are we in danger of following our culture rather than the Bible with regard to singleness, whilst at the same time, super-spiritualising it all in terms of "waiting on the Lord"? After all, if we are single it has to be "God's will" that we are, right? Or, maybe not.

Well. I wouldn't expect Mrs Maken to extol the virtues of this most holy of gifts, but really, this is too much!
And as if things simply couldn't get any worse, this "special event" as they sinfully describe it, is also flagged up as being an opportunity for some "pre-Valentine's Day flirting"! No nicely asexual, brotherly/sisterly fellowshipping opportunities there then!
Of course, instead of an appropriate venue, such as a Nunnery, this talk is actually taking place in nothing short of a den of iniquity, described as an "opulent" photography gallery, with red chandeliers, candles, billowing drapes, and even beds (yes, beds!) on which to "lounge"! All shamelessly taking place in the hours of daylight no less!
How the good Reverend Longbottom's drawn, ashen face would have paled even further at the thought!
I simply cannot wait until we have a new Vicar appointed!
Never fear, readers, never fear, I will not cease in my petitioning of him, the Home Office, our Prime Minister and indeed even Her Majesty herself, to ensure that Debbie Maken is turned back from these shores immediately upon arrival at Immigration!

Make Love Your Goal...for 2007!

Captain Sensible writes: Regular readers may recall that just prior to Christmas, I mentioned that a church had played the 80s track The Power of Love by Frankie Goes to Hollywood at their carol service, the chorus of which contains the words: "Make love your goal."
The lyrics of this beautiful song reveal a dual meaning, which illustrates perfectly the link between agape love and romantic love, both of which I believe God has given us to enjoy and for our benefit.
Being a very recent convert to the wonders of YouTube, I have now found the video, which you can view here.
Finding love is not all about "waiting" and "trusting", despite what dear Frieda Fruitcake and friends may say.
Over spiritualising something that God has instructed us to actively pursue, can lead to comments like this one that I read recently: "Obviously we are dependent on our sovereign God to orchestrate the details of meeting a future husband."
Er -- it might help if we left the house sometimes though...
We know that God's Word is "a lamp to (our) feet and a light for (our) path." (Psalm 119: 105)
But what good is a lamp and a light if the feet aren't moving?
Very recently, an opportunity arose that held the promise of a great blessing.
In a situation like that, should I just remain stationary and await the blessing? Or should I walk purposefully to claim it?
As the song says: "Make love your goal."
And then let's get moving towards it!

UK Government-Sponsored Study States: "Married People are Happier"

Captain Sensible writes: A report commissioned by the UK Government, and written by Paul Dolan, a professor of economics at Imperial College London, has concluded that married people are happier than singles!
"It's shown that married people are happier -- so what does that mean for politics? Does it follow that we should be encouraging people to marry?" Dolan is quoted as asking in The Sunday Times newspaper today.
Prayer is listed too -- a surprising happiness ingredient for supposedly secular Britain.
So, happiness is achieved through marriage (oh, and having plenty of sex is mentioned!), through prayer, plus spending time chatting to neighbours is also a major contributing factor.
Hmm -- this reminds me of something. Now what could it be?
Love God, love your spouse, love your neighbour...
Got it!
It's the Bible.
(Note to self: Don't forget Tony Blair's invitation to Debbie Maken's talk!)

Breaking News: Debbie Maken is coming to London!

Captain Sensible writes: Great news, folks!!! Debbie Maken has very kindly accepted an invitation to come and speak over here in London, England! Debbie will be here from the 26th to the 29th January, and she will be presenting a keynote talk in central London on Saturday 27th January. There will also be the opportunity for questions and an open discussion on issues relating to singleness and the contemporary church's attitude towards it.
So if you are in Washington, USA; Canberra, Australia; Tokyo, Japan; or even Ulaanbaatar, Mongolia (okay, I did have to look that one up); there has never been a better time to visit this fine British capital city of London!
(You might also want to consider coming to this event if you are actually in London -- or anywhere else in the UK for that matter too!)
Read all about it on the London Christians website and get booking (air fare/hotel or maybe just tickets for this crucially important event!) post-haste!!!

Pssst! A Glimpse into the Mysterious World of the SCM (Otherwise known as the Single Christian Male)

Species: Single Christian Male
Age: Approximately mid-30s
Country of Origin: South Africa
Scene of Discovery: New Year's Eve party, London, England.

"Of course, I could speak to some of the women here, and then after about ten minutes of talking to one of them, it's possible I might start to find feelings developing. But I wouldn't know if that person was 'God's best' for me. You have to wait on the Lord."

Wait for what, one wonders? Thunderbolt? Visitation from the Angel Gabriel? Pillar of fire? Burning bush? (Or at least a smouldering Christmas tree. It's only polite to give the Lord something to work with.)